Life....

Dear Journal,
Why does it seems so endless. Why doesnt God answer my prayers? Has he forsaken me? or has He forgotten about me? it cant be because I believe in His word that he hasn't if he did i would be already dead.

I dont know what to say about the life i am in right now about the sins in my life truly its sometimes hard to realise that the reality of it that i have anger that leads to pain and guilty suffering. and really certain things in my life seems to desolated and hopeless but still God is bring me forward. i wish i could come out from the wandering into the desert out that into the promise land that He has promised me.

What am i to God? really think about it and see that he is true to most of us. Expectations that he has for us is beyond my own understanding. What is really his plans for me after all? I cant really see the full picture of it all yet to be honest its like burning in my mind on what is the reason i am created to be? am i here just for nothing?

The question still remains but gladly God is always in the picture in everything.

Why?

Life is so tortured by the fact that i cant even do the most simple job and its like bring me to the point where i need to trust in God more. The thing is that I need to discipline my self more and be more diligent in the thing that i do.
I find myself becoming more lazier then before. So i need to buck up in order that i can improve in my studies because my results were really horrible this time round. The thing that God has been speaking to me is about my spiritual life is it dry and weary or my flame for God has gone? who is my Father?
i need the fire for the youth once again......

God please help me....

Revived

Its a dead blog almost dead because hadn't the time to updated it.

anyway the test has already been out and the results i got was horrible i tell you. IT WAS HORRIBLE~

In terms that i didn't really study much for this exam thats why. Well planning to put more efforts for the upcoming exams and aiming for something higher is not impossible because its not. It's the matter of work.

The thing is that sometimes challenges that I face in life....

Is the thing that changes my life into more like a man and more firm in the things that I decide to do. Got to work hard and ALWAYS trust in God. Amen.

O that this too too sullied flesh would melt,
Thaw and resolve itself into a dew,
Or that the Everlasting had not fix'd
His canon 'gainst self-slaughter.  O God!  God!
How weary, stale, flat, and unprofitable
Seem to me all the uses of this world!
-Hamlet-